Wednesday, March 10, 2010


I'm going to get a little nerdy on you guys.

I took an exam today, and one of the concepts was about a postwar juncture. What's a postwar juncture you say? Well, put simply, it's a strategic moment in time where the climate allows leading nation-states to reshape a new international world order.

It sounds like a bunch of phooey but essentially, I think I'm about to experience a postwar juncture.

What war went on? Well, it wasn't particularly a war. It wasn't particularly even that huge when you look at how long it took to start and end. It really only took an hour. It started off with a simple text message asking a friend who I definitely admire, "How are you?"

I've noted with this person that I heavily admire, that he has his ups and downs. Sometimes communication is really top-notch and positive, and we're definitely on the same wave length. Sometimes communication seems depressing on his end and very self-doubting and self-interested. He lacks to see outside himself at these times.

Today, was one of those times.

We had a back and forth exchange and our focus were miles apart. We saw the same thing very differently. Spring break is this next week. I expressed excitement for it. He expressed his apathy because it'd be filled with endless assignments and school work. I so badly just wanted to cheer him up. It caused me physical pain to see him focus on that aspect.

I said you don't need to be physically away or free from responsibilities to have an awesome Spring Break. I added, and I wish you could see what I see.

The last statement meant so many things, but I knew he was mired in his own situation to see that my statement meant an abundance of things. It meant that I wish nothing but happiness for you. It meant that I used to be so negative and it hurts to see anyone live the way you do. It meant that I knew his audience was lost because he was so caught up in his situation. It meant that I wanted him to snap out of this state because it was hindering him from seeing the true beauty of the world in that present moment.

That was my approach. I don't regret it because I stuck to my principles and if there was unintended backlash, it's not my fault. So I get a lengthy, lengthy response back. Not quite "verbal invective" but there were so many things I read that caused me physical pain because it was just, our philosophies didn't mesh. To put it simply, he was someone I considered in a lot of ways compatible for me. This response showed another side I otherwise missed behind rose-colored glasses. I focus on the outcome, and I choose to surround myself with strong, beautiful souls.

I don't care about your titles, what your work obligations are, how stressed you are, because if you breach your character, that's what matters. Choose to live a life of integrity. Choose to live what you say.

Although I was initially a bit disappointed, I know it's fleeting, and I've already begun the path to move forward. As a friend, he cancelled a meeting with me, without even indicating to me that he did not require my presence. My time is not less valuable if I have less commitments, so I felt disrespected. As a business relationship, I lost trust, and as an emerging friend, he's chosen the path of acquaintanceship.

But it's good. He knows exactly that I mean what I say. My religion is positivity and if he wants to stand in the way and change my mind on something that I've seen before and after, I will choose the way I live over his any day of the week.

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